A Guide to Finding Your Personal Style

The “I Have Nothing to Wear” Lie (and Why It’s Not About Your Closet)

Last spring, I stood in front of my overflowing closet, already late for work and whispered to myself: “Why do I own 12 blouses but still feel like I’m playing dress-up?” The answer hit me like a poorly ironed shirt: I was dressing for the woman I thought I should be, not the one I was becoming. Sound familiar?

Here’s the truth: Your wardrobe isn’t just fabric and threads. It’s a daily declaration of yourself. And if your clothes don’t align with who you are (or who you’re growing into), no amount of “capsule wardrobe” hacks or TikTok trends will fix that hollow “I still don’t feel like me” feeling.
This spring, let’s skip the trend reports and ask the real question: What does the woman you’re becoming actually wear? (Spoiler: It’s not just “beige and bored.”)

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The 3-Pillar Framework for Identity-Aligned Dressing

1️⃣ Pillar 1: Clarity Over Chaos: Define Your “Style Archetype”

There’s one thing every woman should ask herself once: what’s my personal style?
To know what works best for you, you first have to look at two things: your body and your essence.
What do I mean by that?
You probably heard of body types. These are described in various definitions like apple, pear, hour glass, straight, H, A, X and more. Then there’s the Kibbe body types like Gamine, Romantic or Natural. All of these are used to describe the proportions of your body and whether you are more rounded or not. You can use that to determine the shape, cuts and basic style that may fit you.

And I say may, because then you have to look at your essence and here’s where we leave the basic „I am an hour glass shape“ mentality.
Have you ever thought: This should absolutely enhance my body type, but somehow I look off?It’s because your clothes don’t fit your essence. Here we also have different discriptions. There’s Kitcheners definitions that uses facial structures in addition to the bone structure and flesh of Kibbe to find whether you are soft or sharp featured. Your essence tells you what fabrics to choose, what and how much jewellery works with you and whether you should add frills or keep to sleek lines.

These are also kind of like style archetypes. But I found something I like even more than discovering that I am a Kibbe Romantic with a Classic Essence: Ellie Jean Royden uses a body matrix based on wide or narrow, short or long and round or straight with medium as an option to define your body shape and gives 8 style roots based on nature of which you combine three based on what you feel and look best in, which makes it perfect to style for your personality:

🌸 flower: delicate, airy, intricate
🔥 fire: sensual, glamorous, luxurious
🍄 mushroom: simple, neutral, minimal
⛰️ mountain: powerful, formal, professional
🌱 earth: natural, rugged, outdoorsy
☀️ sun: playful, experimental, creative
🪨 stone: sporty, relaxed, industrial
🌙 moon: dark, moody, edgy 

Learning that I was a Medium Medium Round with Mountain + Mushroom Style Roots changed my fashion life! My third root is still something of a variable, like if I’m going to a rock concert or festival I’m definitely adding moon. My work fit is more mountain, mushroom and then earth or flower and in dating I’m definitely adding fire. But knowing my main root is mountain changed all of my outfits. I feel better and feel like my clothes really fit me more.

Now that you know how to dress for your personality, body type and essence it’s time to check out something else: colours.
Colour analysis are everywhere and while I don’t believe these seasons are the non plus ultra and you cannot wear anything other than your palette, there’s something you should watch:

Whether you’re warm or cold toned.

In seasonal colour analysis this decides if you’re a winter, summer or a spring, autumn palette. And these can enhance your feature or wash you out.

I tried a lot of free colour analysis on the market and it’s basically the question: warm or cold, high contrast in the features or low contrast.
For me, I knew for a long time that I was warm toned. And usually identified as a spring. Which was a little tricky because my coloured hair does give me the higher contrasting features, but my natural hair doesn’t.
After looking at the colours on the palette and trying on the clothes in that palette I came to realise: I am a true autumn.
But, I can lean on colours in the true spring palette. I do look good in spring neutrals and oranges as well as greens, but spring blues and me, not a fit. Whereas I can wear the full autumn palette.

I have a whole Pinterest board with all my analysis, palettes, roots and essences as well as outfit inspirations. Check it out.

You wouldn’t let your boss dictate your career goals. So why let fast fashion dictate your style?

Actionable Steps:
How to find your personal style once you determined body type, essence and colours.

• Take the “5-Word Challenge”: Grab a notebook and write down 5 adjectives that describe the woman you’re becoming. (Example: Mine were “confident, effortless, bold, warm, and unapologetic.”) Now, audit your closet: Does each piece reflect at least one of those words? If not, it’s clutter, even if it’s “in style.”
• Are the pieces in your body type, style, essence or colour or can you combine them to fit them? Heavy tops and soft bottom can soften up the overall look or you can sandwich a colour not in your palette with pieces in your colours and create a cohesive look. The goal is not to throw away your whole wardrobe.
• Steal This Trick: Use Pinterest privately (no algorithms judging you!) to create a “Style Identity” board. Pin outfits that make you think, “Damn, I’d wear that to [insert dream scenario].” After 20 pins, you’ll see your archetype start to emerge. (Mine? “CEO who lunches in Edinburgh but can still look effortless and can still wander the highlands“)
• Find your fashion inspirations: You need at least three fashion inspirations: your body type, your colour type and your essences. To me that’s Kate Winslet, Kate Middleton, Julianne Moore.
  
• Want to learn even more? “The Curated Closet*” by Anuschka Rees helps you define your style and curate a closet that fits your needs.

Did You Try This?

“If your closet was a dating profile, would it swipe right on the current you? Or is it still stuck matching with ‘2019 Corporate You’?”

2️⃣ Pillar 2: The “Hell Yes” Edit: Quality Over Quantity (Even on a Budget)

This is the part where we find a minimalistic but versatile wardrobe for professional you, so have a sustainable closet for your careers and at the same time build a timeless wardrobe that even saves you money in the long run.
You’re not “saving money” by buying a $20 blazer you’ll replace in 3 months. You’re donating to the “I’ll Deal with This Later” fund.

The Rules:

• The 80/20 Rule: 80% of your wardrobe should be “hell yes” pieces that make you feel like a version of yourself. The other 20%? Experimental wildcards (because growth requires play). That 20% can even include the current fashion trend part, because we still want to look instyle.
• Investment Hierarchy: Spend on:
  1. Shoes (they carry you,literally). You wear them for years and good shoes support your feet the whole day and don’t hurt after your commute to the office.
  2. Bags. Truly the most timeless pieces. And it’s not about designer bags. No, we need something sturdy with a long usage span.
  3. Outerwear (it’s the first thing people see). A good jacket should last you years if not a lifetime.
• Budget Hack: Vinted is your friend. Especially in your finding phase. Then look for smaller, sustainable brands, that offer truly timeless pieces without the luxury brand price tag.

Pro Tip:

“A $200 bag you’ll use daily is cheaper than five $50 bags you’ll donate. Math.”

3️⃣ Pillar 3: The “Mirror Test”: Does It Align with Your Future Self?

The key is dressing for your goals and for growth. If you’re still looking like the college intern, who will seriously see you as the successful career woman. Yes, you can start with the standard pieces, but we want to curate our wardrobe now that we’re not the entry job level anymore.

The question you should ask yourself is: If you wouldn’t wear it to your dream job interview, why are you wearing it to your current job?

The Mirror Test Workflow:

1. Hold up the item. Ask: “Does this represent where I’m going or where I’ve been?”
2. Check the fit. Not just physically, emotionally. Does it make you stand taller? Or slouch into “meh”?
3. Style it with your “power piece.” (Mine’s a vintage brillant ring my grandma gave me. Yours might be a watch, a necklace or killer earrings. It should be something that makes you go: „Damn, girl.“) If the outfit doesn’t elevate your power piece, it’s not worthy. If you don’t have a power piece yet try this: what makes you feel more confident. Like, are you like me and rings make you put your hands on the table in a confident pose and take control of the meeting?

Want to know the theory behind? „The Psychology of Fashion*” by Carolyn Mair describes the connection behing psychology and fashion, truly fascinating.

❓ Q&A: Your Burning Style Questions, Answered

1. “I love color but my office is all black/gray. How do I rebel (professionally)?”
   → Answer: Start with ‘micro-doses’: a silk scarf in muted colours or graphics, emerald green or brown loafers, a coloured shirt or blouse under the black suit or a lipstick that makes you feel like a villain in a rom-com. See how its received. Maybe no one before you dared to break the establishment, but it’s not a forbidden thing. <If there’s a written dresscode I would keep to that. I once worked at a place that clearly stated: black, brown, navy, grey or beige suits or costumes and no white costumes allowed. But then you can still play with the combinations and a coloured shirt or blouse. I wouldn’t recommend going into colour blocking or bright red immediately, but you can be subtle and colourful.
2. “I work from home. Why bother dressing up?”
   → Answer: Because ‘athleisure’ is a lie. Your brain performs better when your body feels prepared. If I’m just doing admin all day that does work out, but for meetings or even that „meh“ costumer email? Try ‘zoom-ready’ tops + comfy bottoms, it’s the WFH uniform of champions. And will enhance your confidence. Also add makeup and do your hair on those days. Even an overnight blowout that you take down directly before the call with give you a boost.
3. “How do I stop impulse buying?”
   → Answer: Implement the ‘72-Hour Rule’: If you still want it after 3 days, then buy it. (90% of my ‘must-haves’ become ‘mehs’ by hour 48.) This also works great with a budget. I have a yearly fashion budget that I divide in to the months. Every year I have a focus. Last year I needed to add to my summer wardrobe, this year it’s spring and autumn. Now I look at my wish list, delete the „mehs“ and then I prioritise according to my budget and needs. That’s how I decide this month I will buy this jacket and then I can only fit that blouse into my budget and next month it’s these shoes and that skirt if I still want them.

🎯Your Spring Style Manifesto

This isn’t about “spring cleaning” your closet. It’s about curating a wardrobe that grows with you. One that whispers (or shouts), “Yes, this is who I am. And this is where I’m going.”

Your Action Plan:

1. Today: Do the 5-Word Challenge. Text a friend your list, accountability works.
2. This Week: Pick one “hell yes” item to invest in. (Start small: a belt, a pair of earrings, a lipstick.)
3. This Month: Schedule a “closet date” with yourself. Play music, pour wine and only keep what passes the Mirror Test. The rest you can sell on Vinted or another platform of your choice and fill up your fashion budget.

Final Thought:

“Style isn’t about what you wear. It’s about how you live. And darling, you’re not dressing for the gram. You’re dressing for the legacy.”

💬 P.S. Remember Sarah from accounting? She started dressing for her “future self” (a.k.a. swapped her frumpy cardigans for structured blazers) and got promoted and asked out by the cute barista. Coincidence? I think not. Your turn.